I would be remiss if I did not take the time to recall some of the events of the past month, in addition to birthdays and travel. This blog post may be more for myself than for all of you, so that in the future when we read these posts we can recall all of our experiences in Calabria and we can fully remember the events of this time in our lives. Feel free to read on if you feel compelled by my rambling writing style.
The month of April of course started with Tyler's birthday, but back home it also brought some tough times. First, my sister who had been struggling with really intense pain due to a slipped disk in her back was dealt the unfortunate fate of needing two different surgeries on her spine in the span of two weeks. (This saga actually began in March and continued into April). The poor thing was on bed rest after her first surgery, but then after the second surgery had to be in the hospital for two weeks on bed rest in the truest sense of the word and due to the circumstances was not able to see her kids for two weeks. Her husband was working over time being super dad, and our parents were helping out as best they could. In those weeks, I would have given anything to be back in Chicago with her to help out with the kids, or at the very least hang out with her in the hospital watching soap operas all afternoon. Alas, Tyler and I were relegated to simply calling when we could (which is not easy given our internet connection at home) and hoping that she would get better each day and be able to go home to her family soon. We're happy to report that she did in fact make it home in time for both her husband's birthday and her own, and seems to be more or less back to normal. I know they are happy that the last couple months are behind them and hope that the month of May brings a lot less chaos.
In early April, I also went to Brussels for a work meeting that proved to be very interesting and productive. I was left feeling like I have my work cut out for me, but also that this project is something I can really contribute something to. I can use the things I learned in my lab at Michigan and try to apply them on a much larger scale, and that feels good. I'm also making some good contacts both in the U.S. and internationally, which I think will be good for me in the future. It was after this trip that I met up with Tyler and some of his family in Rome and we got to spend a week traveling around Italy, which as you already know was a really great time.
Unfortunately, also during that week with Tyler's family we received the news that my graduate school advisor, Jerry Keeler, passed away after a 3-year battle with cancer. This news was in some ways expected, because we had known for a couple of weeks that his health was declining, but it was no less heartbreaking both for me and for Tyler. During the 7 1/2 years that I worked with him Jerry as an undergrad and graduate student, he allowed me to be involved in a number of really interesting projects, he introduced me to some of the best scientists in our field, and he taught me more about being a good scientist than I ever imagined he would. Like any good graduate advisor, he made me answer all of my own questions and he scrutinized every number I ever calculated and every word I ever wrote. It was not until one of our last meetings before I finished my degree when I fully realized the wealth of knowledge in his head, and the fact that he had only been able to pass a fraction of it onto me. In that moment, I wanted to stop time and postpone finishing just a little bit longer (which any graduate student will tell you is not a normal thought when you are in the final stages of a dissertation). I just wanted to learn everything I possibly could from him, but it was in fact time for me to go off and start to learn these things for myself. I will forever be thankful that Jerry was my advisor. I think because of him, I might just be able to contribute something to the scientific community. But the other great thing about Jerry is that he was also a friend. He was the kind of guy you could talk college sports with, or drink a beer with on an Ann Arbor summer afternoon. He told corny jokes, and often took them too far. Once he even threw sausages at me during a football tailgate. He told me his philosophy on graduate school more times than I can count, perhaps in hopes that I would follow in his example. He cared about my family and my friends. He was also there when I met Tyler, he was there when we got engaged, and he was there when we got married. He was a husband, a father, a coach, a professor, and an all around good person. It still brings tears to my eyes to my eyes to know that he is gone from this world, but I am extremely grateful that I was able to know him for as long as I could.
Of course April brought us some good news as well. While we were traveling with Tyler's family we also got the news that Tyler's paperwork had finally gone through at the Prefecture in Cosenza, and as a result he could finally get his Visa. We have been waiting for this news for more time than I want to think about. Consequently, Tyler has returned to the U.S. for a couple of weeks and as far as we know, he should get his Visa any day now. While in the U.S., he has so far managed to hit up Chicago, Ann Arbor, Detroit, and now Portland. Yesterday he surprised his mom by showing up for Mother's Day weekend, which no doubt was a completely amazing moment. I'm a bit lonely without him here, but I'm happy he's able to be in the U.S. right now to see family and friends, and I'm happy that when he gets back we can continue trying to put this phase of the bureaucracy behind us (til next year...). Tyler is also starting to make some job contacts over here and even gave his first English conversation lesson right before he left. I think it went well, and already a couple of my colleagues are trying to arrange lessons with him.
In the rest of his time, Tyler has been hard at work in our garden. The seeds are sprouting and it seems that this summer we will have quite a nice vegetable and herb garden. Italians still seem perplexed that Tyler would bring tomato seeds from the U.S. (this is Italy, after all) but I think they will all be surprised this summer when they see all his tomatoes in various shapes and colors (yes my Italian friends, tomatoes can in fact be a color other than red).
On the whole, things are looking up for us I think. I miss Tyler today more than words can say, and I miss my family too. But I know that there are just going to be days like this. And as I recount the events of the past month, I am sitting on our back steps feeling the warmth of the spring sun admiring the growth of our tomato and basil plants. It is beautiful here today. I know that we've all had our ups and downs as of late, but my hope is that May brings us all the spring weather we are longing for and along with it the hope of good days to come.
